Tempted?

All Bible quotes are from the NIV (2011)

1 Zondervan. “About Us.” Zondervan, 2021.

2 American Bible Society. State of the Bible 2017: A Report from American Bible Society. American Bible Society, 2017.

3 Akomolafe, Bayo. These Wilds Beyond Our Fences: Letters to My Daughter on Humanity’s Search for Home. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books, 2017.

In These Wilds Beyond Our Fences, Bayo Akomolafe offers a unique perspective on human connection and belonging through intimate letters to his daughter. Having left Christianity, Akomolafe bridges worlds by speaking from a decolonial perspective, reflecting on the tension between his past religious identity and his current worldview. His writing explores themes such as fatherhood, identity, and the search for home, inviting readers to reconsider their relationships with themselves, others, and the world. By weaving personal experiences with larger philosophical and decolonial inquiries, Akomolafe challenges conventional thinking, offering a fresh lens through which to understand contemporary issues of belonging and identity.

4 Oliver, Mary. Wild Geese. In Dream Work, 29. Boston: Beacon Press, 1986.

5 “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” (Matthew 28:19-20)

6 “You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.” (John 14:14)

7 “For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.” (1 John 2:16)

8 “The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.” (Galatians 5:19-21)

9 “The woman was dressed in purple and scarlet, and was glittering with gold, precious stones and pearls. She held a golden cup in her hand, filled with abominable things and the filth of her adulteries. The name written on her forehead was a mystery:

BABYLON THE GREAT
THE MOTHER OF PROSTITUTES
AND OF THE ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH.” (Revelation 17:4-5)

10 Kaur, Rupi. 2020. Home Body. Kansas City, Missouri: Andrews McMeel Publishing.

11 “Neither do people pour new wine into old wineskins. If they do, the wineskins will burst, the wine will run out, and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins, and both are preserved.” (Matthew 9:17)

12 Nickerson, Raymond S. “Confirmation Bias: A Ubiquitous Phenomenon in Many Guises.” Review of General Psychology 2, no. 2 (1998): 175–220.

This article explores confirmation bias, the tendency to seek, interpret, and remember information that confirms pre-existing beliefs while ignoring contradictory evidence. Nickerson examines the phenomenon’s widespread presence in individual decision-making, scientific reasoning, and social contexts, emphasizing its potential to distort judgments and reinforce erroneous beliefs.

13 Miller, Alice. The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self. Translated by Ruth Ward. New York: Basic Books, 1981. Originally published in 1979.

Alice Miller’s The Drama of the Gifted Child examines how emotionally sensitive children often suppress their authentic selves to meet the expectations of authority figures, including those shaped by religious teachings. She critiques how rigid religious frameworks that emphasize obedience, sin, or self-sacrifice can perpetuate patterns of emotional repression, contributing to psychological struggles in adulthood.

14 Winell, Marlene. Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books, 2006. 

Marlene Winell’s Leaving the Fold offers guidance and psychological support for individuals who have left fundamentalist religious communities. The book addresses the emotional challenges of deconstruction, including grief, guilt, and identity crises, while providing practical strategies for healing and rebuilding a fulfilling life outside of rigid religious frameworks.

Lott, Benjamin, and Raymond D. Knight. “Religious Trauma and the Personal Struggles of Faith: Psychological Effects of Religious Doctrine on the Self.” Journal of Traumatology 19, no. 4 (2016): 167–181.

This article explores the psychological impact of religious trauma, focusing on how rigid doctrines and fear-based teachings can contribute to emotional distress and self-identity struggles. Lott and Knight examine how individuals grappling with faith-related trauma often experience guilt, anxiety, and difficulty reconciling personal beliefs with institutional dogma, emphasizing the need for trauma-informed support in these cases.

15 “Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority, because they keep watch over you as those who must give an account. Do this so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no benefit to you.” (Hebrews 13:17)

16 “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” (Ephesians 5:33)

 17 “Women should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission, as the law says.” (1 Corinthians 14:34)

18 “Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” (1 Corinthians 7:5)

19 “Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people.” (Ephesians 6:5-7)

20 Launay, Jacques. “Choir Singing Improves Health, Happiness – and Is the Perfect Icebreaker.” University of Oxford, September 2019. https://www.ox.ac.uk/research/choir-singing-improves-health-happiness-%E2%80%93-and-perfect-icebreaker.

Jacques Launay’s article highlights the physical and psychological benefits of choir singing, including reduced stress, enhanced social bonds, and improved mood. Drawing on research from the University of Oxford, Launay explains how collective singing fosters a sense of community and connection, making it an effective activity for breaking down social barriers.

21 Hanson, Rick. Hardwiring Happiness: The New Brain Science of Contentment, Calm, and Confidence. New York: Harmony, 2013.

In Chapter 2 of Hardwiring Happiness, Rick Hanson explains how the brain’s negativity bias often amplifies negative experiences while overlooking positive ones. He introduces practical strategies for intentionally internalizing positive experiences to rewire the brain, promoting greater emotional resilience and long-term well-being.

 22 Akomolafe, Bayo. “Foreword.” Bayo Akomolafe Official Website. Accessed January 30, 2025. https://www.bayoakomolafe.net.

23 Van der Kolk, Bessel A. The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. New York: Viking, 2014. 

Chapter 7, Getting on the Same Wavelength: Attachment and Attunement, explores the critical role of secure attachment and emotional attunement in healthy development and trauma recovery. Van der Kolk examines how disruptions in early attachment relationships can impact brain development and emotional regulation, while emphasizing the importance of relational safety and connection in healing from trauma.

24 Brown, Peter. The Body and Society: Men, Women, and Sexual Renunciation in Early Christianity. New York: Columbia University Press, 1988.

Chapter 1, Body and City, examines the relationship between bodily practices and societal structures in early Christianity, focusing on how sexual renunciation was tied to broader cultural and urban dynamics. Brown contextualizes the rise of asceticism within the moral and social fabric of the ancient city, exploring how early Christian attitudes toward the body reflected and challenged prevailing Greco-Roman norms.

25 Foucault, Michel. The History of Sexuality, Vol. 1: An Introduction. Translated by Robert Hurley. New York: Pantheon Books, 1978.

In The History of Sexuality, Vol. 1, Michel Foucault examines how power operates through the regulation of bodies and desires, particularly within religious and societal frameworks. He critiques the ways Christian institutions historically exercised control over sexuality, framing desire as a site of moral discipline and subject formation.

26 Walker, Pete. Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving. Petaluma, CA: Azure Coyote, 2013.

In Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving, Pete Walker discusses the impact of religious trauma on individuals, particularly how rigid doctrines and punitive teachings can contribute to body dissociation and emotional dysregulation. He emphasizes the importance of reconnecting with the body as a vital step in healing from trauma rooted in controlling or abusive religious environments.

27 “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

28 “Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.” (Genesis 3:7, NIV)

29 “To the woman he said, ‘I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.'” (Genesis 3:16, NIV)

30 “The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’” “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.” (Genesis 3:2-6)

31 “Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, ‘Did God really say, “You must not eat from any tree in the garden?”‘” (Genesis 3:1)

32 “And the Lord God said, ‘The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.’ So the Lord God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life.” (Genesis 3:22-24)

33 American Psychiatric Association. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. 5th ed. Arlington, VA: American Psychiatric Publishing, 2013.

Pages 669–672 of the DSM-5 outline the diagnostic criteria for trauma-related disorders, emphasizing the physiological and psychological effects of trauma on individuals. This section provides a framework for understanding conditions like PTSD, including symptoms, prevalence, and contributing factors, offering a clinical perspective on trauma and its treatment

34 Vaknin, Sam. Malignant Self-Love: Narcissism Revisited (Prague: Narcissus Publications, 2015), 143.

In Malignant Self-Love: Narcissism Revisited, Sam Vaknin examines the destructive nature of narcissistic personality disorder, focusing on how individuals with narcissistic traits manipulate others and create toxic, controlling environments. On page 143, Vaknin discusses the ways in which narcissistic behaviours can manifest within relationships, including religious contexts, where spiritual leaders or institutions may use narcissistic tactics to control followers.

35 “You shall have no other gods before me.” (Exodus 20:3)

36 “I am the Lord, and there is no other; apart from me there is no God. I will strengthen you, though you have not acknowledged me, so that from the rising of the sun to the place of its setting people may know there is none besides me. I am the Lord, and there is no other.” (Isaiah 45:5-6)

37 “Do not worship any other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.” (Exodus 34:14)

“So Israel yoked themselves to the Baal of Peor. And the Lord’s anger burned against them.
The Lord said to Moses, ‘Take all the leaders of these people, kill them and expose them in broad daylight before the Lord, so that the Lord’s fierce anger may turn away from Israel.’ So Moses said to Israel’s judges, ‘Each of you must put to death those of your people who have yoked themselves to the Baal of Peor.’ Then an Israelite man brought to his family a Midianite woman right before the eyes of Moses and the whole assembly of Israel while they were weeping at the entrance to the tent of meeting.
When Phinehas son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, saw this, he left the assembly, took a spear in his hand and followed the Israelite into the tent. He drove the spear through both of them—the Israelite and the woman—into her body. Then the plague against the Israelites was stopped; but those who died in the plague numbered 24,000.” (Numbers 25:3-9)

38  “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.” (Romans 12:1)

39 “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” (1 Peter 2:9)

40 “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?” (2 Corinthians 6:14-15)

41 Yoder, John Howard. The Politics of Jesus. Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans, 1972.

In The Politics of Jesus, John Howard Yoder critiques the ways in which Christian beliefs have been historically used to justify social and political hierarchies, with believers often placed in a superior position. Yoder challenges the church’s interpretation of scripture that fosters a sense of superiority and division between Christians and non-Christians

42 “I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips.” (Psalm 34:1)

43 “From the rising of the sun to the place where it sets, the name of the Lord is to be praised.” (Psalm 113:3)

44 “The Ninevites believed God. A fast was proclaimed, and all of them, from the greatest to the least, put on sackcloth. When Jonah’s warning reached the king of Nineveh, he rose from his throne, took off his royal robes, covered himself with sackcloth, and sat down in the dust. This is the proclamation he issued in Nineveh: ‘By the decree of the king and his nobles: Do not let people or animals, herds or flocks, taste anything; do not let them eat or drink. But let people and animals be covered with sackcloth. Let everyone call urgently on God.’” (Jonah 3:5-9

45 Herman, Judith. Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence—From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror. New York: Basic Books, 2015.

Herman discusses how perpetrators of trauma—whether in the context of domestic abuse, political terror, or institutional oppression—use psychological tactics to manipulate and confuse victims. These tactics often involve denial of reality, distortion of facts, and minimization of the victim’s feelings or experiences. These are key components of what we now refer to as gaslighting. For example, Herman writes about how abusers often undermine the survivor’s perception of their own experiences, making them doubt their own thoughts, memories, and feelings. This is a hallmark of gaslighting, where the victim is led to believe that they are “crazy” or that their experiences are exaggerated or invalid

46 “You are to lay your hand on the head of the burnt offering, and it will be accepted on your behalf to make atonement for you. You are to slaughter the young bull before the Lord, and then Aaron’s sons the priests shall bring the blood and splash it against the sides of the altar at the entrance to the tent of meeting. You are to skin the burnt offering and cut it into pieces. The sons of Aaron the priest are to put fire on the altar and arrange wood on the fire. Then Aaron’s sons the priests shall arrange the pieces, including the head and the fat, on the wood that is burning on the altar. You are to wash the internal organs and the legs with water, and the priest is to burn all of it on the altar. It is a burnt offering, a food offering, an aroma pleasing to the Lord.” (Leviticus 1:4-9)

47 “When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening. Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean, and anything she sits on will be unclean.” (Leviticus 15:19-20)

48 “When she is cleansed from her discharge, she must count off seven days, and after that she will be ceremonially clean. On the eighth day she must take two doves or two young pigeons and bring them to the priest at the entrance to the tent of meeting. The priest is to sacrifice one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. In this way he will make atonement for her before the Lord for the uncleanliness of her discharge.” (Leviticus 15:28-30)

49  “Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.” (Matthew 5:17)

50 Nicene Creed. The Nicene Creed. 325 CE. In The Apostolic Fathers: Volume I: I Clement, II Clement, Ignatius, Polycarp, Didache, edited by Bart D. Ehrman, 62. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 2003.

“We believe in one God, the Father Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth, and of all things visible and invisible. And in one Lord Jesus Christ, the only-begotten Son of God, begotten of the Father before all worlds; Light of Light, very God of very God; begotten, not made, being of one substance with the Father, by whom all things were made.”
(Nicene Creed, 325 AD)

51 Festinger, Leon. A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance. Stanford, CA: Stanford University Press, 1957.

In A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance, Leon Festinger examines how individuals cope with conflicting beliefs or uncomfortable truths, often through rationalization or the use of consistent affirmations. In the context of Christianity, phrases like “God is Good!” can serve as a psychological defense mechanism, helping believers avoid confronting doubts or contradictions in their theology by reaffirming a fixed belief, thus reducing the discomfort of cognitive dissonance.

52 “Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'” (Matthew 19:26)

53 American Psychiatric Association. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. 5th ed. Arlington, VA: American Psychiatric Publishing, 2013. 

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) provides guidance on diagnosing Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD), which often includes traits like disregard for others’ rights, aggression, and violent behaviour. Psychopathy, while not explicitly defined as a diagnosis in the DSM-5, is often used interchangeably with APD in clinical settings, though psychopathy is a more specific term used in certain diagnostic tools like the Hare Psychopathy Checklist-Revised (PCL-R).

Hare, Robert D. Without Conscience: The Disturbing World of the Psychopaths Among Us. New York: The Guilford Press, 1999.

In Without Conscience, Robert Hare discusses psychopathy, emphasizing that psychopaths often display a profound lack of empathy, remorse, and moral conscience. While not all psychopaths are violent, many exhibit a tendency toward violence and may experience a desire to kill, as part of their manipulative, self-serving nature.

54 “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.” (Romans 12:1)

55 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple.” (Luke 14:26)

56 Pope Alexander VI. Inter Caetera. May 4, 1493. In The Papal Bull of Pope Alexander VI: “Inter Caetera”, translated by Peter G. McNally, 1-3. London: Catholic Truth Society, 2012.

The Doctrine of Discovery is primarily associated with a series of papal bulls, notably the Papal Bull Inter Caetera issued by Pope Alexander VI in 1493. This bull divided the New World between Spain and Portugal, giving them the right to claim lands “discovered” by Christians and subjugate non-Christian populations.

57 Morison, Samuel Eliot. Admiral of the Ocean Sea: A Life of Christopher Columbus. Boston: Little, Brown and Company, 1942.

This book provides a detailed account of Columbus’ life and voyages, including his first journey in 1492 to what he believed was Asia but ultimately led to the discovery of the Caribbean islands.

58 Dunbar-Ortiz, Roxanne. An Indigenous Peoples’ History of the United States. Boston: Beacon Press, 2014.

Dunbar-Ortiz, a Native American scholar, critically examines the European colonisation process, including Columbus’s voyages, and the resulting legacy of violence and dispossession. This text offers a critical and reflective perspective on the history of European exploration and its consequences for Indigenous nations. It’s an excellent starting point for understanding how early colonial narratives have shaped Indigenous identities and histories.

59 “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” (Psalm 37:4)

60 Osteen, Joel. Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential. New York: Free Press, 2004.

Joel Osteen, a prominent Charismatic Evangelical preacher, often speaks about God blessing believers with material prosperity. Here’s a quote from his book Your Best Life Now:

“God wants to bless you with abundance, with good health, and with the desires of your heart. He wants to see you succeed, and He wants to see you thrive in all areas of life. When you honour Him, you will be blessed with material prosperity, and you’ll have everything you need to live a fulfilled and prosperous life.”

61 Wesley, John. A Plain Account of Christian Perfection. London: Epworth Press, 1997.

John Wesley, a founder of Methodism, claimed that nations that follow God’s teachings, particularly Christian principles, will be blessed with prosperity and peace. In this work, Wesley discusses the moral and spiritual foundations of nations, encouraging them to follow Christian principles for both individual and national blessings

62 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

63 Deloria, Vine Jr. God Is Red: A Native View of Religion. 2nd ed. Golden, CO: Fulcrum Publishing, 1994.

Deloria critiques the historical relationship between Christianity and Indigenous peoples, particularly how Christian missions have been complicit in colonization. He discusses how Indigenous spirituality and worldview were marginalized and how Christians can engage with Indigenous communities in a more respectful, reciprocal way today. This book is a critique of the church’s historical role and provides valuable insight into how reparative action can be approached.

Cone, James H. The Cross and the Lynching Tree. Maryknoll, NY: Orbis Books, 2011.

Cone addresses the horrific legacy of racism in the United States and the church’s role in perpetuating it, particularly the history of lynching and the failure of many Christian communities to stand against racial violence. He proposes that Christians, especially in predominantly white churches, need to confront the history of racism and work toward reparations, justice, and healing. Cone’s work is a powerful call for Christians to acknowledge the violent history of racial oppression and take meaningful action to address it.

Medina, Néstor. Decolonizing Christianity: Religion and the End of Empire. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2020.

Medina examines how Christianity was used as a tool of colonization in Latin America and the Caribbean and offers a critical perspective on how Christianity can be decolonized today. He advocates for a Christianity that is more aligned with the struggles and hopes of Indigenous and marginalized communities. Medina calls for Christians to engage in deep self-reflection and address the historical harms perpetuated by the church, including its role in empire-building.

McNeilly, Anne E. C. The Church and the Indigenous Peoples: Reconciliation or Reparations? Toronto: University of Toronto Press, 2020.

This work specifically focuses on the relationship between Christianity and Indigenous peoples, critiquing the role of the church in colonization, and exploring how the church can work towards reconciliation and reparations. McNeilly looks at the theological and practical steps Christians can take to acknowledge the harms done and advocate for justice and healing. The book also discusses the importance of Indigenous voices in the process of decolonizing faith and addressing the injustices of the past

64 “but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.” (Genesis 2:17)

65 “Every living thing that moved on land perished—birds, livestock, wild animals, all the creatures that swarm over the earth, and all mankind. Everything on dry land that had the breath of life in its nostrils died. Every living thing on the face of the earth was wiped out; people and animals and the creatures that move along the ground and the birds were wiped from the earth. Only Noah was left, and those with him in the ark.” (Genesis 7:21-23

66 But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare. Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming. That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat. But in keeping with his promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, where righteousness dwells. (2 Peter 3:10-13)

67 Secular Therapy Project. “Dr. Darrel Ray.” Secular Therapy Project. Accessed January 3, 2025. https://www.seculartherapy.org/dr-darrel-ray.

This webpage provides an overview of Dr. Darrel Ray’s professional background and contributions, including his founding of the Secular Therapy Project. It highlights his work in connecting individuals with secular mental health resources and his broader efforts to support those questioning or leaving religion.

68 Ray, Darrel. The God Virus: How Religion Infects Our Lives and Culture. Bonner Springs, KS: IPC Press, 2009.

In this work, psychologist Darrel Ray examines how religious ideas can act like viruses, infecting individuals and cultures. Chapter 4 delves into the impact of introducing fear-based religious concepts to young children, highlighting potential long-term psychological effects. The discussion on child brain development and the psychological impact of fear-inducing religious concepts, such as the notion of hell, is primarily found in Chapter 4, titled “God Loves You – The Guilt That Binds.”

69 Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, “Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied. Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, whom you love—Isaac—and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.” (Genesis 22:1-2

70 Durvasula, Ramani S. Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist. New York: Post Hill Press, 2015.

Durvasula examines how narcissists systematically test relationships through manufactured crises and impossible demands, creating a pattern of proving love and loyalty. Her analysis reveals how these tests serve to maintain control while simultaneously setting up the target for inevitable failure, creating a cycle of emotional manipulation and dependency.

71 Kernberg, Otto F. Borderline Conditions and Pathological Narcissism. Lanham: Rowman & Littlefield, 2004. 

Kernberg provides a comprehensive clinical framework for understanding how pathological narcissists use relationship testing as a mechanism for control and validation. His work specifically examines how these loyalty tests serve both to assuage the narcissist’s deep insecurity and to maintain power differentials in relationships.

72 Fisher, Helen. Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love. New York: Henry Holt, 2004. 

Fisher examines how dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin interact in states of intense attachment and religious experience. Her work provides insight into how religious ecstasy and relationship addiction share neurochemical patterns.

73 Tennov, Dorothy. Love and Limerence: The Experience of Being in Love. 2nd ed. New York: Scarborough House, 1999. 

Tennov coined the term “limerence” and explores how this intensely ecstatic state can be manipulated in controlling relationships. Her work details how the biochemical rewards of limerence can create addiction-like patterns, particularly relevant in understanding religious ecstasy and devotion.

74 van der Kolk, Bessel. The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. New York: Penguin Books, 2014. 

Specifically discusses how trauma bonding and intermittent reinforcement trigger dopamine and oxytocin releases, creating powerful biochemical rewards for passing “tests” of loyalty. The relief and euphoria after perceived near-loss (like Abraham’s experience) produces intense neurochemical responses that reinforce the trauma bond.

75 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1)

76 “The LORD said to Moses, ‘When you return to Egypt, see that you perform before Pharaoh all the wonders I have given you the power to do.'” (Exodus 4:21)

77 But I will harden Pharaoh’s heart, and though I multiply my signs and wonders in Egypt, he will not listen to you. Then I will lay my hand on Egypt and with mighty acts of judgment I will bring out my divisions, my people the Israelites. (Exodus 7:3-4)

78 “But the Lord hardened Pharaoh’s heart and he would not listen to Moses and Aaron, just as the Lord had said to Moses.” (Exodus 9:12)

79 At midnight the Lord struck down all the firstborn in Egypt, from the firstborn of Pharaoh, who sat on the throne, to the firstborn of the prisoner, who was in the dungeon, and the firstborn of all the livestock as well. Pharaoh and all his officials and all the Egyptians got up during the night, and there was loud wailing in Egypt, for there was not a house without someone dead. (Exodus 12:29-30)

80 “Pharaoh and all his officials and all the Egyptians got up during the night, and there was loud wailing in Egypt, for there was not a house without someone dead.” (Exodus 12:30)

81 Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. [Some manuscripts include here, wholly or in part, “and they waited for the moving of the waters. From time to time an angel of the Lord would come down and stir up the waters. The first one into the pool after each such disturbance would be cured of whatever disease they had.”] One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?” “Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked. The day on which this took place was a Sabbath. (John 5:3-9)

82 At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked, “Who touched my clothes?” “You see the people crowding against you,” his disciples answered, “and yet you can ask, ‘Who touched me?’” (Mark 5:30-31)

83 “You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me.” (Exodus 20:5)

84 “Do not worship any other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.” (Exodus 34:14)

85 Argyle, Kenneth I. The Psychology of Religion and Coping. New York: Guilford Press, 1997.

This book explores the interplay between psychology, religion, and coping mechanisms, focusing on how individuals use religious beliefs to navigate life’s challenges. On page 248, Argyle delves into the specific psychological effects of fear-based religious narratives, offering a scholarly perspective on their long-term impact on mental health.

86 “The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.” (Galatians 5:19-21)

87 American Psychiatric Association. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. 5th ed. Arlington, VA: American Psychiatric Publishing, 2013.

88 “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (1 John 4:8)

89 “The mind governed by the flesh is death… the mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God.” (Romans 8:6-8)

 90 “For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature [flesh]. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)

91 Decretum Gelasianum. The Development of the Canon of the New Testament. Accessed January 3, 2025. https://ntcanon.org/Decretum_Gelasianum.shtml.

The Decretum Gelasianum is a Latin text traditionally attributed to Pope Gelasius I (492–496 CE), though scholarly consensus places its origin in the 6th century, likely in Southern Gaul. This document is significant for its inclusion of a canonical list of scriptures, reflecting early efforts to define the biblical canon in Western Christianity.

92 Foucault, Michel. The History of Sexuality, Vol. 1: An Introduction. Translated by Robert Hurley. New York: Pantheon Books, 1978.

Foucault’s seminal work examines the development of sexuality as a concept and its intersections with power, knowledge, and societal structures. In this first volume, he critiques the “repressive hypothesis” and explores how sexuality is used as a mechanism of control and identity formation within Western societies.

93 Hopkins, Keith, and Mary Beard. The Colosseum. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 2005.

Hopkins and Beard provide a comprehensive exploration of the Colosseum, examining its historical, cultural, and architectural significance in ancient Rome. This book blends scholarly analysis with accessible narrative, offering insights into the amphitheater’s role in Roman society and its enduring legacy in popular culture.

94 MacMullen, Ramsay. Christianizing the Roman Empire: A.D. 100-400. New Haven, CT: Yale University Press, 1984.

MacMullen explores the sociopolitical and cultural processes that facilitated the spread of Christianity within the Roman Empire between A.D. 100 and 400. The book provides a detailed analysis of how conversions occurred, highlighting the influence of persuasion, coercion, and institutional adaptation in shaping the Christianisation of Roman society.

95 Brown, Peter. Power and Persuasion in Late Antiquity: Towards a Christian Empire. Madison, WI: University of Wisconsin Press, 1992.

Brown explores the transformation of the Roman Empire as Christianity rose to prominence, focusing on the interplay of power, persuasion, and religious authority. This work provides a nuanced analysis of how Christian leaders utilized rhetorical strategies and political alliances to reshape societal norms and imperial governance

96 “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” (Ephesians 5:22-24)

97 “But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.” (1 Corinthians 11:3)

98 “But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 12:36-37)

99 Oliver, Mary. “The Summer Day.” In New and Selected Poems, 94-95. Boston: Beacon Press, 1992.

100 Blake, William. The Marriage of Heaven and Hell. Edited by Keynes, Geoffrey, 2nd ed. London: Oxford University Press, 1970.

101 “They went out from us, but they did not really belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they would have remained with us; but their going showed that none of them belonged to us.” (1 John 2:19)

102 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.” (Matthew 7:7-8)

103 “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” (2 Chronicles 7:14)

104 “So when I come, I will call attention to what he is doing, spreading malicious nonsense about us. Not satisfied with that, he even refuses to welcome other believers. He also stops those who want to do so and puts them out of the church.” (3 John 1:10)

105 “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.” (Matthew 18:6)

106 “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

107 “For truly I tell you, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished.” (Matthew 5:18)

108 McDonald, Lee Martin. The Formation of the Biblical Canon. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Academic, 1995.
Catholic Answers. “Who Compiled the Bible and When?” https://www.catholic.com/qa/who-compiled-the-bible-and-when.

This discussion highlights the role of the Council of Rome in 382 CE under Pope Damasus I in the formal recognition of the biblical canon. Drawing on Lee Martin McDonald’s The Formation of the Biblical Canon, it explores how early Church councils standardized the biblical texts, shedding light on the historical processes behind the creation of the Christian Bible as we know it.

109

Bruce, F. F. The Canon of Scripture. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1988.

In The Canon of Scripture, F. F. Bruce examines the historical development of the biblical canon, emphasizing the theological and historical criteria that influenced the inclusion of specific texts. Pages 145–46 focus on the early Church’s discernment process, shedding light on the role of councils and early theologians in affirming the authoritative books of Scripture.

110 McDonald, Lee Martin. The Formation of the Biblical Canon: The Crisis of the Canon. Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publishers, 2007.

In The Formation of the Biblical Canon, Lee Martin McDonald explores the historical, theological, and political factors that shaped the development of the biblical canon. Pages 174–75 address key debates and crises within early Christianity that influenced which texts were deemed authoritative, offering insights into the dynamic and contested process of canon formation.

111 Westminster Assembly. The Westminster Confession of Faith and Catechisms. Edited by G. I. Williamson. Philadelphia: Presbyterian & Reformed Publishing, 1987.

Chapter 1, Section 3 of the Westminster Confession of Faith asserts the divine authority of Scripture and emphasizes the closure of the biblical canon, rejecting the inclusion of additional texts beyond those recognized as inspired. This section reflects the Reformed tradition’s commitment to Scripture as the ultimate standard for faith and practice.

112 Bruce, F. F. The Canon of Scripture. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1988.

In The Canon of Scripture, F. F. Bruce provides a comprehensive overview of how the biblical canon was formed. On pages 145–46, he discusses the early Church’s process of discerning and formalizing the canon, highlighting the theological, historical, and communal considerations that influenced the recognition of authoritative texts.

113 Ibid

114 Festinger, Leon. A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance. Stanford, CA: Stanford University Press, 1957.

Leon Festinger’s A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance introduces the concept of cognitive dissonance, a psychological phenomenon where individuals experience discomfort when holding contradictory beliefs or when their actions conflict with their values. The book explores how people strive to reduce this discomfort through rationalisation, belief adjustment, or behavioral change, laying the foundation for a significant area of psychological research. This theory is particularly relevant in the context of Christianity, where believers may struggle with inherent cognitive dissonance—such as reconciling the idea of a loving God with the doctrine of eternal damnation. 

Festinger, Leon, Henry W. Riecken, and Stanley Schachter. When Prophecy Fails: A Social and Psychological Study of a Modern Group that Predicted the Destruction of the World. Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press, 1956.

When Prophecy Fails examines the dynamics of a doomsday cult whose prophecy about the end of the world did not come to pass, focusing on the psychological mechanisms the group used to maintain belief despite it not happening. The authors analyse how cognitive dissonance drives individuals to rationalise failed predictions by doubling down on their beliefs, offering insights into group behavior, belief perseverance, and self-justification.

115 Stern, Robin. The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life. New York: The Penguin Group, 2007.

In The Gaslight Effect, Robin Stern explores the psychological manipulation tactic known as gaslighting, where individuals are made to doubt their perceptions, memories, and reality. Stern outlines the signs of gaslighting, its emotional impact, and provides strategies for recognizing and surviving this form of abuse, empowering individuals to regain control and restore their sense of self

116 Winell, Margaret. Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books, 2006.

In Leaving the Fold, Margaret Winell offers practical guidance and emotional support for individuals transitioning out of fundamentalist religious communities. The book explores the psychological and social challenges faced by those deconstructing their faith, with particular focus on the trauma of leaving rigid belief systems. Winell provides strategies for healing, self-rediscovery, and rebuilding a fulfilling life outside of restrictive religious frameworks.

117 Jung, Carl. The Undiscovered Self: The Dilemma of the Individual in Modern Society. 1957. Translated by R.F.C. Hull. Princeton: Princeton University Press, 1971, p. 22.

In The Undiscovered Self, Carl Jung explores the tension between the individual’s true self and the pressures of society, particularly in the context of religious and collective ideologies. On page 22, Jung discusses how religious institutions can suppress the individual’s inner life, leading to a loss of personal authenticity. This is particularly relevant to those deconstructing their Christian faith, as it highlights the psychological struggle of reconciling personal identity with external religious expectations and doctrines.

118 Herman, Judith. Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence—From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror. New York: BasicBooks, 1992, p. 118.

In Trauma and Recovery, Judith Herman examines the profound psychological effects of trauma, with a particular focus on how both personal and collective violence can reshape identity and perception. On page 118, she discusses the stages of recovery, emphasising the importance of reclaiming agency and rebuilding trust in the self and others. This is particularly relevant to individuals deconstructing their Christian faith, as the trauma of religious abuse or manipulation can lead to a similar process of recovery, where regaining personal autonomy and trust is key to healing.

119 National Domestic Violence Hotline. “What Is Gaslighting?” https://www.thehotline.org/resources/what-is-gaslighting/.

The article from the National Domestic Violence Hotline explains the concept of gaslighting, a psychological manipulation tactic where an individual seeks to make another doubt their reality, perceptions, and memories. This form of emotional abuse is prevalent in many environments, including religious contexts, where it can be used to control individuals, undermine their self-trust, and enforce conformity.

120 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (1John 4:8)

121 “Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.” (John 3:18); “Anyone whose name was not found written in the book of life was thrown into the lake of fire.” (Revelation 20:15); “And throw them into the blazing furnace, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” (Matthew 13:50); “Then the king told the attendants, ‘Tie him hand and foot, and throw him outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’” (Matthew 22:13)

122 Fromm, Erich. The Art of Loving. 1956. Revised edition. New York: Harper & Row, 1995, P. 123.

In The Art of Loving, Erich Fromm explores the concept of love as an art that requires knowledge, effort, and commitment, rather than a mere emotional reaction. On page 123, he discusses the importance of self-love and the ability to love others in a healthy, non-dependent way, which is often hindered by rigid, controlling religious structures. For those deconstructing their Christian faith, Fromm’s insights provide a framework for understanding the need for genuine, self-directed love, free from the constraints of doctrinal fear and guilt.

123 “Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.” (John 3:18)

124 Herman, Judith. Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence—From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror. New York: Basic Books, 1992.

Judith Herman’s seminal work explores the psychological and societal impact of trauma, offering a framework for understanding both personal recovery and collective response to systemic abuse. In discussing abusive systems, Herman highlights their reliance on rigid binary categorisations, such as “good versus evil” or “us versus them,” to maintain control and suppress dissent, a dynamic relevant to understanding the interplay between trauma and religious structures.

125 “and do not give the devil a foothold.” (Ephesians 4:27)

126 Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen. Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. (Romans 1:24-26)

127 Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs. Power and Control Wheel. Duluth, MN: Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs, 1984.

The Power and Control Wheel is a foundational tool developed by Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs to illustrate the dynamics of abusive relationships. It highlights how categorisation and labelling are utilised as mechanisms of control, reinforcing power imbalances and limiting the autonomy of victims.

128 Moon, Dawne. Beyond the Closet: The Transformation of LGBTQ Christian Lives. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2004.

Moon explores the experiences of LGBTQ Christians navigating the intersection of faith and sexuality, focusing on how internalised religious homophobia shapes their identities and spiritual journeys. This work provides a nuanced analysis of the personal and communal transformations that occur when traditional religious teachings conflict with individual authenticity.

129 Bridges, Judith S. The Psychology of Female Sexual Fluidity in Religious Contexts. New York: Routledge, 2017.

Bridges examines the interplay between female sexual fluidity and religious influences, focusing on mechanisms such as denial and rationalisation. This work highlights how women navigate conflicting identities in contexts where religious doctrine suppresses or redefines expressions of sexuality.

130 Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs. Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming. Duluth, MN: Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs, 1984.

This resource from the Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs explores how abusers employ tactics like minimising, denying, and blaming to distort and undermine their victim’s sense of reality. The parallels drawn between these tactics and those used in some religious contexts reveal how similar methods can reinforce power imbalances and control through the manipulation of perception and accountability.

131 Herman, Judith. Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence—From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror. New York: Basic Books, 1992.

Herman’s groundbreaking work delves into the psychological and societal mechanisms that perpetuate trauma, including the “conspiracy of silence” surrounding abuse. She argues that this silence serves to protect perpetrators and maintain systemic power imbalances, while simultaneously isolating victims and preventing their recovery.

132 Stark, Evan. Coercive Control: How Men Entrap Women in Personal Life. New York: Oxford University Press, 2007.

Stark’s work examines coercive control as a form of abuse, focusing on the tactics of isolation and reality distortion used to entrap women in abusive relationships. By analysing these mechanisms, Stark illuminates how abusers systematically dismantle their victims’ autonomy and sense of self, drawing parallels to broader societal structures of control.

133 “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:2-4)

134 Lifton, Robert Jay. Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism: A Study of “Brainwashing” in China. Chapel Hill, NC: University of North Carolina Press, 1989.

Lifton’s seminal study analyses the mechanisms of ideological control within totalistic environments, focusing on the concept of “sacred science.” He explains how cults and similar systems enforce absolute doctrines as unquestionable truth, stifling critical thought and reinforcing dependency on the group’s leadership.

135 Hassan, Steven. Combating Cult Mind Control: The Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults. Rev. ed. Boston: Freedom of Mind Press, 2015.

Hassan’s work provides an in-depth exploration of the tactics used by cults to manipulate and control their members, with a specific focus on information control. He highlights how limiting access to outside information and creating an environment of dependency serves to isolate individuals and sustain the cult’s authority.

136 Australia’s National Research Organisation for Women’s Safety (ANROWS). [Title of Specific Report or Publication]. Sydney: ANROWS, 2021.

This ANROWS publication examines gendered violence in Australia, focusing on the systemic factors contributing to women’s safety and well-being. The 2021 report provides evidence-based insights and recommendations for addressing domestic violence, coercive control, and societal attitudes perpetuating inequality.

137 Boxall, Hayley, and Anthony Morgan. Experiences of Coercive Control among Australian Women. Statistical Bulletin no. 30. Canberra: Australian Institute of Criminology, 2021.

In this study, Boxall and Morgan examine the prevalence and characteristics of coercive control among Australian women, highlighting the nuanced and pervasive nature of non-physical abuse in intimate relationships. Their findings underscore the importance of recognizing coercive control as a critical component of domestic abuse, with implications for policy development and support services.

138 Australian Institute of Health and Welfare. The Effects of Coercive Control: Understanding Cumulative Abuse. Canberra: Australian Institute of Health and Welfare, 2024.

The Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (AIHW) emphasizes that coercive control is not defined by specific incidents but rather by an ongoing, repetitive, and cumulative pattern within a relationship. This form of abuse can involve subtle or covert behaviors that may appear innocuous to outsiders but are experienced as abusive and controlling by the victim.

139 Van der Kolk, Bessel. The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. New York: Viking, 2014.

Van der Kolk explores the profound impact of trauma on the brain, body, and mind, including the dynamics of collective trauma in institutional settings. He examines how the things individuals disclose and the secrets they keep within these environments shape collective identity, perpetuate trauma, and hinder recovery.

140 Western Australia Parliament. Inquiry into the Financial Administration of Homelessness Services in Western Australia. Perth: Western Australia Legislative Council, 2022. Accessed January 3, 2025. https://www.parliament.wa.gov.au/Parliament/commit.nsf/(Report+Lookup+by+Com+ID)/2ABA1113F29846094825890A00268F40/$file/221128%20-%20EF%20inquiry%20report.pdf.

This report by the Western Australia Parliament investigates the financial administration and governance of The Esther Foundation, a residential rehabilitation program for women and girls. The inquiry uncovers allegations of abuse experienced by residents, including psychological manipulation, religious coercion, and neglect, highlighting systemic failings in oversight and governance. The report offers recommendations for preventing similar abuses in institutional care settings

141 “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” (Galatians 2:20)

142 DeYoung, Patricia. Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame: A Relational/Neurobiological Approach. 2nd ed. New York: Routledge, 2020.

In Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame, Patricia DeYoung explores how chronic shame can manifest in various forms, including religious contexts. She discusses how individuals may internalize feelings of unworthiness and guilt, leading to behaviors aimed at seeking redemption or approval. This internalization can result in a persistent sense of inadequacy, where individuals feel compelled to engage in acts of contrition to alleviate their shame.

143 Klein, Linda Kay. Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free. New York: Touchstone, 2018.

Klein explores the lasting impact of the evangelical purity movement on a generation of young women, examining how its teachings around sexual purity fostered shame, fear, and self-doubt. Drawing on personal experiences and interviews, she critiques the movement’s effects on mental health and spirituality, while offering insights into the process of healing and reclaiming agency.

144 Herman, Judith. Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence—From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror. New York: Basic Books, 1992.

Herman’s seminal work addresses the dynamics of trauma, including the pervasive issue of victim-blaming in various societal and institutional contexts. She examines how religious environments can perpetuate victim-blaming by framing suffering as a test of faith or moral failure, reinforcing systemic power imbalances and hindering recovery.

145 End Coercive Control USA. Spiritual Abuse and Victim-Blaming in Coercive Control. Accessed January 3, 2025. https://endcoercivecontrolusa.com.

Spiritual abuse involves the misuse of religious beliefs and practices to exert control over individuals, often leading to psychological harm and undermining personal autonomy. Victim-blaming, a tactic frequently employed in coercive control, shifts responsibility onto the victim, perpetuating the cycle of abuse and hindering recovery.

146 Amber. “Victim Blaming and Coercive Control.” End Coercive Control USA. https://endcoercivecontrolusa.com/blog/victim_blaming_and_coercive_control.

In this article, Amber addresses the issue of victim blaming within the context of coercive control, highlighting how abusers manipulate their victims into believing they are at fault for the abuse they experience. This is relevant to the deconstruction of Christianity, as many individuals raised in controlling religious environments may have internalised similar patterns, where guilt and shame are used to enforce conformity and maintain power structures. Recognising these dynamics is essential for reclaiming autonomy and healing from coercive religious control.

147 Abuse Refuge. The LGBTQ+ Community and Religious Abuse: Trauma Unseen. Accessed January 3, 2025. https://abuserefuge.org/the-lgbtq-community-and-religious-abuse-trauma-unseen/.

The LGBTQ+ Community and Religious Abuse: Trauma Unseen” is an insightful article that delves into the often-overlooked trauma experienced by LGBTQ+ individuals within religious contexts. It highlights how spiritual abuse and religious trauma can profoundly impact the mental health and well-being of LGBTQ+ persons, particularly those involved in Evangelical Christian

148 Moon, Dawne. Beyond the Closet: The Transformation of Gay and Lesbian Life. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2004.

Moon examines the complex intersections of sexual identity and religious belief, focusing on the experiences of LGBTQ individuals navigating these overlapping aspects of identity. She highlights the phenomenon of religious self-gaslighting, where individuals internalize religious teachings that conflict with their sexual orientation, leading to cognitive dissonance, self-doubt, and a repressive denial of authentic identity.

149 “And if your eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell.” (Matthew 18:9)

150 “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.” (Ephesians 5:22)

151  “Do not have sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman; that is detestable.” (Leviticus 18:22)

152 Myers, Charles D., Jr. “What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality.” Anima, vol. 19, no. 1, September 1992, p. 50.

Charles D. Myers, Jr. notes that in ancient Israel, same-sex relations were viewed as an ancient Near Eastern problem, particularly involving pederasty and relations between an older man and a boy, which was the primary form of homosexual sex at the time.

153 Lings, K. Renato. “The ‘Lyings’ of a Woman: Male-Male Incest in Leviticus 18.22?” Theology & Sexuality, vol. 15, no. 2, May 2009, pp. 233-255.

K. Renato Lings’ linguistic study leads to the conclusion that Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13 continue the theme of incestuous relationships, suggesting that the passage should be paraphrased as: “Sexual intercourse with a close male relative should be just as abominable to you as incestuous relationships with female relatives.”

154 Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse. Final Report: Religious Institutions. Volumes 16. Canberra: Australian Government, 2017. Accessed January 3, 2025. https://www.childabuseroyalcommission.gov.au/reports.

The Final Report: Religious Institutions from the Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse provides a comprehensive analysis of child sexual abuse within religious institutions in Australia. It documents significantly higher rates of abuse in these settings compared to secular institutions and examines institutional factors, such as hierarchical structures and cultures of secrecy, that enabled the abuse

John Jay College of Criminal Justice. The Nature and Scope of Sexual Abuse of Minors by Catholic Priests and Deacons in the United States 1950-2002. Washington, DC: United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, 2004. Accessed January 3, 2025. http://www.usccb.org/issues-and-action/child-and-youth-protection/upload/The-Nature-and-Scope-of-Sexual-Abuse-of-Minors-by-Catholic-Priests-and-Deacons-in-the-United-States-1950-2002.pdf.

This report, commissioned by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops and conducted by the John Jay College of Criminal Justice, provides a comprehensive analysis of sexual abuse of minors by Catholic priests and deacons in the U.S. from 1950 to 2002.

Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse (IICSA). Final Report. London: Her Majesty’s Stationery Office, 2022. Accessed January 3, 2025. https://www.iicsa.org.uk/publications/final-report.

The Final Report of the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse (IICSA) examines the systemic failures in preventing and responding to child sexual abuse within a variety of institutional settings in the UK, including religious organisations.

15 Lu, Xing. Rhetoric of the Chinese Cultural Revolution: The Impact on Chinese Thought, Culture, and Communication. Columbia, SC: University of South Carolina Press, 2004.

Lu examines the rhetorical strategies employed during the Chinese Cultural Revolution, focusing on how public shaming and struggle sessions were used as tools for ideological enforcement and social control. The book provides a detailed analysis of the psychological and cultural impact of these practices on individuals and the broader society.

156 Chinese Communist Party. Resolution on Certain Questions in the History of Our Party Since the Founding of the People’s Republic of China. Adopted at the Sixth Plenary Session of the Eleventh Central Committee of the Communist Party of China, June 27, 1981. Accessed January 3, 2025. 

https://www.marxists.org/subject/china/documents/cpc/history/01.htm.

This official resolution from the Chinese Communist Party provides a historical assessment of its actions since 1949, including a critical evaluation of the Cultural Revolution (1966–1976). The document acknowledges the movement as a significant mistake, describing it as “responsible for the most severe setback and the heaviest losses suffered by the Party, the country, and the people” since the founding of the People’s Republic, reflecting an institutional effort to confront and distance itself from past errors.

157 Conrad, Joseph. Heart of Darkness. 3rd ed. New York: Norton, 2006.

158 Boswell, John. Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1980.

In Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality, John Boswell examines the historical relationship between Christianity and homosexuality, arguing that early Christian teachings were not as intolerant toward same-sex relationships as commonly believed. He presents evidence that social tolerance for homosexuality existed in the early church and was gradually replaced by more rigid condemnations. 

159 Genesis 18 – 19

160 Judges 19 – 21

161 Tajfel, Henri, and John C. Turner. “An Integrative Theory of Intergroup Conflict.” In The Social Psychology of Intergroup Relations, edited by William G. Austin and Stephen Worchel, 33-47. Monterey, CA: Brooks/Cole, 1979.

Tajfel and Turner’s work presents the Social Identity Theory, which explains how intergroup conflict arises from individuals’ identification with social groups. The theory suggests that group members may express ingroup favoritism and outgroup hostility, which can contribute to the internalization of negative stereotypes about others, including homophobic attitudes. This foundational theory helps explain the dynamics of prejudice and discrimination within social groups

162 Meyer, Ilan H. “Prejudice, Social Stress, and Mental Health in Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Populations: Conceptual Issues and Research Evidence.” Psychological Bulletin 129, no. 5 (2003): 674-697.

In this influential article, Ilan H. Meyer explores how prejudice and social stress impact the mental health of lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals, introducing the minority stress model. Meyer discusses how internalized homophobia, driven by fear of societal rejection, can lead to negative self-perceptions and even homophobic behaviors. This research is key in understanding the psychological toll of social stigma on sexual minorities.

163 Boswell, John. Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality: Gay People in Western Europe from the Beginning of the Christian Era to the Fourteenth Century. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1980.

In this seminal work, John Boswell challenges conventional interpretations of Christian doctrine regarding homosexuality by examining the historical treatment of gay people in Western Europe. He argues that early Christian views were more tolerant of same-sex relationships than traditionally believed and explores how attitudes toward homosexuality evolved over time. This book is crucial for understanding the historical intersection of religion and sexual identity in Western Europe.

164 “Do not wear clothing woven of two kinds of material.” (Leviticus 19:19)

165 “Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard.” (Leviticus 19:27)

166 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:3-5)

167 Foucault, Michel. The History of Sexuality: Volume 1: An Introduction. Translated by Robert Hurley. New York: Pantheon Books, 1978.

In The History of Sexuality: Volume 1, Michel Foucault examines the development of discourse around sexuality in Western societies, challenging the common narrative that sexual repression increased in the modern era. Foucault argues that rather than being repressed, sexuality became a central topic of discussion and regulation through various institutions, particularly the Church. He suggests that Jesus did not explicitly address sexuality, and the Church’s later emphasis on regulating sexual behavior emerged as part of broader mechanisms of power and control over the individual body. This text is fundamental in understanding the intersection of power, sexuality, and social institutions.

168 Sojourners. “Some More Than 2,000 Verses of Scripture on Poverty and Justice.” Sojourners, 19 Sept. 2008, https://sojo.net/list-some-more-2000verses-scripture-poverty-and-justice.

This article from Sojourners compiles a vast collection of over 2,000 Bible verses related to poverty and justice, highlighting the strong biblical emphasis on caring for the marginalized and fighting injustice. It serves as a powerful resource for understanding the biblical foundation for social justice, offering a comprehensive list that advocates for the poor, oppressed, and disadvantaged in society. The article underscores the call for Christians to respond to issues of poverty and social injustice through both personal action and systemic change.

169 Sider, Ronald J. Rich Christians in an Age of Hunger: Moving from Affluence to Generosity. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2015.

In Rich Christians in an Age of Hunger, Ronald J. Sider challenges affluent Christians to re-examine their relationship with wealth and to embrace a lifestyle of generosity. He argues that, in light of global poverty, Christians must move from a mindset of affluence to one of active compassion, addressing systemic injustice, and living out the call to care for the poor. The book combines biblical teachings with social analysis to call believers to a more radical expression of generosity and responsibility in addressing global hunger and poverty.

170 Oliver, Mary. Wild Geese. In Dream Work, 29. Boston: Beacon Press, 1986.

171 Akomolafe, Bayo. “Foreword.” Bayo Akomolafe Official Website. Accessed January 30, 2025. https://www.bayoakomolafe.net.

172 Winell, Marlene. Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion. Berkeley: Apocryphile Press, 2007.

In Leaving the Fold, Marlene Winell explores the psychological challenges faced by individuals leaving fundamentalist religious communities, focusing on the impact of dogmatic belief systems on personal autonomy and critical thinking. Winell discusses how many religious institutions, particularly fundamentalist ones, fear external opinions and alternative viewpoints because they recognize that their own teachings often cannot withstand scrutiny. This fear of questioning and the suppression of independent thought are central to how such communities maintain control over their members. Winell offers practical advice for former believers, guiding them through the process of rediscovering their own sense of self, free from the constraints of unchallenged religious authority.

173 Hassan, Steven. Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-Selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults. Newton, MA: Freedom of Mind Press, 2018.

In Combating Cult Mind Control, Steven Hassan provides an in-depth analysis of the psychological techniques used by cults to manipulate and control their members. Drawing on his own experience as a former member of a destructive cult, Hassan offers practical strategies for recognizing and resisting mind control tactics. He emphasizes the importance of critical thinking and personal autonomy in the process of recovery, arguing that cults often suppress questioning and dissent because their teachings cannot withstand rational scrutiny.

174 Lifton, Robert Jay. Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism: A Study of ‘Brainwashing’ in China. Chapel Hill: University of North Carolina Press, 1989.

In Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism, Robert Jay Lifton explores the psychological techniques used by totalitarian regimes to manipulate and control individuals, particularly through “brainwashing.” He identifies key mechanisms of thought reform, such as emotional manipulation and the suppression of critical thinking, which are also common in cults. This work is essential for understanding how ideological control affects personal identity and autonomy.

175 Reference to Mary Oliver’s poem “The Summer Day” – Oliver, Mary. New and Selected Poems, Volume One. Boston: Beacon Press, 1992.

176 Ray, Darrel W. The God Virus: How Religion Infects Our Lives and Culture. Bonner Springs, KS: IPC Press, 2009.

In The God Virus, Darrel W. Ray argues that religion operates like a virus, influencing individuals’ behaviors and thoughts in ways that stifle personal freedom and critical thinking. He explores how religious institutions, including theological colleges, often foster conformity and suppress individuality by promoting strict doctrines that discourage questioning. Ray provides a psychological analysis of how religious beliefs limit personal autonomy and how breaking free from these beliefs can lead to greater self-awareness and freedom.

177 Oxford English Dictionary. “Lust, n.” Oxford University Press, 2023. https://www.oed.com.

178 Ray, Darrel W. Sex & God: How Religion Distorts Sexuality. Bonner Springs, KS: IPC Press, 2012.

In Sex & God, Darrel W. Ray examines how religious teachings have historically distorted human sexuality, often leading to guilt, shame, and repression. Drawing from psychological research and personal accounts, Ray explores the ways in which religious doctrine influences sexual behaviour and attitudes, particularly within conservative religious communities. The book offers insights into how breaking free from these religiously imposed restrictions can lead to healthier, more liberated sexual identities.

179 McClintock, Karen A. Sexual Shame: An Urgent Call to Healing. Minneapolis: Fortress Press, 2019.

In Sexual Shame: An Urgent Call to Healing, Karen A. McClintock explores the psychological and emotional impacts of sexual shame, particularly within religious contexts. She delves into how shame is ingrained through cultural and religious teachings, and how it affects personal sexual identity and well-being. McClintock offers a call for healing, emphasizing the importance of confronting and addressing sexual shame to foster healthier relationships and personal growth.

180 Sellers, Tina Schermer. Sex, God, and the Conservative Church: Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy. New York: Routledge, 2017.

In Sex, God, and the Conservative Church, Tina Schermer Sellers examines how conservative Christian teachings around sexuality contribute to shame and repression, particularly in the context of sexual intimacy. Sellers argues that religious institutions often associate sexuality with sin, leading to deep feelings of shame and disconnection from one’s sexual identity. Through a therapeutic lens, the book offers a framework for healing, advocating for a healthier, more integrated approach to sexual intimacy that transcends shame and embraces sexual well-being.

181 LaHaye, Tim, and Beverly LaHaye. The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1998.

In The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love, Tim and Beverly LaHaye present an evangelical perspective on marital sexuality, emphasizing what they consider the “biblically acceptable” forms of sexual intimacy within marriage. The book outlines the LaHayes’ views on sexual roles, sexual purity, and the importance of a marital bond that aligns with conservative Christian values. It exemplifies how evangelical literature often prescribes rigid guidelines for sexual behavior, aiming to align personal sexuality with doctrinal teachings, and highlights the tension between spiritual and sexual identity in evangelical contexts. This book has been influential in Christian culture since 1976.

182 Smythers, Ruth. Instruction and Advice for the Young Bride: On the Conduct and Procedure of the Intimate and Personal Relationships of the Marriage State for the Greater Spiritual Sanctity of This Blessed Sacrament and the Glory of God. Reprint, The Madison Institute Newsletter, Fall Issue, 1894. Spiritual Guidance Press, 1894. http://www.feministezine.com/feminist/historical/Good-Wifes-Guide.html.

183 Sellers, Tina Schermer. Sex, God, and the Conservative Church: Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy. New York: Routledge, 2017.

In Sex, God, and the Conservative Church, Tina Schermer Sellers examines how conservative Christian teachings contribute to feelings of shame around sexual intimacy, particularly for women. She explores the theological and cultural factors that link sexuality to sin and guilt, and argues that these attitudes can hinder healthy sexual relationships. The book offers therapeutic insights and strategies for dismantling shame and promoting sexual well-being, encouraging a more open and positive understanding of sexuality within religious contexts.

184 Ray, Darrel W. Sex & God: How Religion Distorts Sexuality. Bonner Springs, KS: IPC Press, 2012.

In Sex & God: How Religion Distorts Sexuality, Darrel W. Ray examines the complex relationship between religion and sexuality, arguing that many religious teachings distort natural sexual expression by imposing guilt, shame, and repression. He explores how religious doctrines around sexuality often prioritize control over personal well-being, leading to unhealthy attitudes toward sex and intimacy.

185 DeRogatis, Amy. Saving Sex: Sexuality and Salvation in American Evangelicalism. New York: Oxford University Press, 2015.

In Saving Sex: Sexuality and Salvation in American Evangelicalism, Amy DeRogatis examines how evangelical Christianity shapes and regulates sexual behavior, framing sexual purity as essential for spiritual salvation. She provides a critical analysis of evangelical teachings on sexuality and their impact on individual identity and relationships within American evangelical communities.

186 Sun Tzu. The Art of War. Translated by Lionel Giles, Dover Publications, 2002.

In The Art of War, Sun Tzu discusses various strategies for gaining the upper hand in conflict, including the effective use of deception and infiltration. He emphasizes that it is often more successful to manipulate or control an enemy using someone from within their own ranks, as an insider can exploit trust and knowledge to undermine the group. This principle, applied in both military and psychological warfare, highlights how individuals can be swayed or influenced by those they already trust, a tactic used throughout history.

187 Hardaker, David. Mine is the Kingdom: The Rise and Fall of Brian Houston and the Hillsong Church. Sydney: HarperCollins, 2024.

In Mine is the Kingdom, David Hardaker offers a detailed investigation into the rise of Hillsong Church and its founder, Brian Houston, exploring both the church’s meteoric growth and the controversies surrounding its financial practices. Hardaker discusses how Hillsong’s business ventures, including its use of tax-free for-profit enterprises, were often shrouded in secrecy and led to questions about financial transparency.

188 Wilkie, Andrew. “Whistleblower Documents Reveal Hillsong’s Financial Mismanagement.” Crikey, 9 Mar. 2023, https://www.crikey.com.au/2023/03/09/andrew-wilkie-hillsong-whistleblower-documents/.

In this article, Andrew Wilkie, an Independent Member of Parliament, reveals the contents of leaked whistleblower documents that expose significant financial mismanagement within Hillsong Church. The documents detail allegations of lavish spending and misuse of church funds, raising questions about the church’s financial transparency and ethical practices. Wilkie’s investigation highlights potential legal violations and calls for greater scrutiny of Hillsong’s operations, contributing to ongoing public debate about the intersection of faith-based organizations and financial accountability.

189 de Beauvoir, Simone. The Second Sex. Translated by Constance Borde and Sheila Malovany-Chevallier, Vintage Books, 2011. [Originally published in French, 1949].

Simone de Beauvoir’s The Second Sex is a foundational work in feminist theory. She explores the historical construction of women as “the Other” and how this socialization leads women to internalize patriarchal views. Her famous assertion that “one is not born, but rather becomes, a woman” speaks to the process of social conditioning and internalization of gender roles, which includes patriarchy.

190 LaHaye, Tim, and Beverly LaHaye. The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1981.

Having described this book in great detail in the text, I won’t bore you with it here as well.

191 “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” (Ephesians 5:22-24)

192 Australian Law Reform Commission. Family Violence: A National Legal Response, ALRC Report 114. 2010. https://www.alrc.gov.au/publication/family-violence-a-national-legal-response-alrc-report-114/24-sexual-assault-and-family-violence-2/history-of-activism-and-legal-change/

This report provides a comprehensive history of activism and legal change regarding sexual assault, including the criminalisation of marital rape in Australia. It discusses the shift in legal perspectives and the growing recognition of the need for legal protection against sexual violence within marriage. The section outlines key legal reforms and highlights the role of advocacy in challenging the historical exemption of marital rape from prosecution, marking a significant change in the law in Australia.

The Hotline. “Marital Rape and Domestic Violence.” The Hotline, 2021. https://www.thehotline.org/resources/marital-rape-and-domestic-violence/

This resource provides a detailed overview of marital rape, discussing its prevalence, legal history, and the significant challenges survivors face. It highlights the legal changes that have criminalized marital rape in the U.S., stressing that it is now a crime in all 50 states, though some states still have exemptions. The page also explores the emotional and physical impacts of marital rape, illustrating its devastating effects on survivors.

193 “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.” (Ephesians 5:23)

194 “Let his left hand be under my head and his right hand embrace me.” (Song of Solomon 2:6)

“His left arm is under my head and his right arm embraces me.” (Song of Solomon 8:3)

195 Wheat, Ed, and Gaye Wheat. Intended for Pleasure: Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage. Grand Rapids: Revell, 1994.

In Intended for Pleasure: Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage, Ed and Gaye Wheat provide practical advice for sexual intimacy within Christian marriage, but their approach reflects the limitations of conservative Christian teachings on sexuality. While focusing on marital satisfaction, the book adheres to traditional values that restrict sexual expression, particularly within the confines of a heterosexual, monogamous marriage, and may stifle more inclusive views of sexual freedom.

196 Leonhardt, Nathan D., et al. “Sexual Shame and Religious Fundamentalism Among Emerging Adults: Mediating Role of Abstinence Motivation.” The Journal of Sex Research 57, no. 9 (2020): 1115-1126.

In this study, Nathan D. Leonhardt and colleagues explore how sexual shame and religious fundamentalism are linked among emerging adults, with abstinence motivations serving as a mediating factor. The research highlights how strong fundamentalist beliefs contribute to higher sexual shame, which influences attitudes toward abstinence and sexual behavior during adulthood.

197 Coleman, Eli. “Masturbation as a Means of Achieving Sexual Health.” Journal of Psychology & Human Sexuality 14, no. 2-3 (2003): 5-16.

In this article, Eli Coleman explores the role of masturbation in promoting sexual health, arguing that it is a natural and beneficial part of human sexuality. Coleman challenges traditional stigmas surrounding masturbation, particularly within religious and cultural contexts, by emphasizing its potential to enhance self-awareness, sexual well-being, and overall sexual health. The article provides a nuanced perspective on how masturbation can be a healthy sexual outlet and addresses the psychological and physical benefits of sexual self-care.

198 Mark, Kristen P., et al. “Sexual Compatibility as a Predictor of Relationship Satisfaction.” Current Sexual Health Reports 10, no. 3 (2018): 207-213.

In this article, Kristen P. Mark and colleagues examine the concept of sexual compatibility and its impact on relationship satisfaction. The authors argue that sexual compatibility, defined by mutual sexual preferences and desires, is a significant predictor of overall relationship satisfaction. The study highlights how sexual harmony between partners contributes to emotional closeness, stability, and long-term relationship satisfaction. The article provides valuable insights into the importance of sexual alignment in fostering healthy and fulfilling relationships.

199 Eggerichs, Emerson. Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2004.

In Love & Respect, Emerson Eggerichs explores the fundamental needs of both men and women in marriage, arguing that women primarily desire love, while men crave respect. Eggerichs builds his argument on biblical principles, positing that understanding and meeting these needs is key to marital harmony. The book, however, has been critiqued for reinforcing traditional gender roles, as it often suggests that men and women’s emotional needs are rooted in these prescribed roles, which can limit broader, more egalitarian approaches to marriage dynamics.

200 Diamond, Lisa M. Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women’s Love and Desire. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 2008.

In Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women’s Love and Desire, Lisa Diamond challenges traditional views of fixed sexual orientations, arguing that women’s sexual desires and identities are often fluid and can change over time. Drawing on extensive research, Diamond explores the psychological and social factors that influence sexual fluidity, particularly among women, and examines how cultural expectations around gender and sexuality impact the expression of desire. This work offers a critical perspective on the complexities of sexual identity, emphasizing that women’s experiences of love and desire often do not conform to rigid sexual categories.

201 Thomas, Gary. Sacred Marriage. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2015.

In Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas explores the spiritual dimensions of marriage, arguing that its primary purpose is not just personal happiness, but spiritual growth and holiness. Thomas challenges conventional views of marriage by suggesting that it serves as a tool for sanctification, encouraging couples to see their relationship as a way to deepen their faith and grow closer to God. The book provides a Christian framework for understanding marriage, emphasizing selflessness, service, and mutual respect within the marital bond.

202 Ray, Darrel W. Sex & God: How Religion Distorts Sexuality. Bonner Springs, KS: IPC Press, 2012.

In Sex & God: How Religion Distorts Sexuality, Darrel W. Ray examines the ways in which religious teachings, particularly in Christianity, shape and often distort human sexuality. Ray argues that religious ideologies instill guilt, shame, and repression regarding natural sexual desires, leading to negative consequences for individuals’ sexual health and relationships. The book critiques the moral frameworks imposed by religious institutions and offers a psychological perspective on how sexual freedom and expression can be reclaimed by questioning these teachings.

203 Chandler, Matt, and Lauren Chandler. The Mingling of Souls. Colorado Springs: David C. Cook, 2022.

In The Mingling of Souls, Matt and Lauren Chandler present a traditional Christian view of love and marriage, emphasizing a God-centered approach. While offering valuable insights, the book reinforces restrictive sexual norms, adhering to conventional biblical teachings that limit sexual expression and uphold traditional gender roles. This perspective can stifle broader, more inclusive understandings of sexual freedom within a Christian context.

204 “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:12)

205 Ray, Darrel. The God Virus: How Religion Infects Our Lives and Culture. 2009. Prometheus Books.

In The God Virus, Darrel Ray explores the psychological and sociological mechanisms behind religious belief, arguing that religion functions like a virus, spreading and adapting through culture and individuals. He examines cognitive biases such as confirmation bias, showing how they reinforce religious beliefs by encouraging individuals to seek information that supports their worldview while dismissing contradictory evidence. Ray provides a critical, yet accessible, analysis of how these biases help maintain the persistence of religious ideologies, particularly in Christianity, making it difficult for believers to question their faith.

206 Perel, Esther. Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence. 2006. HarperCollins.

In Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel explores the tension between the need for security and stability in long-term relationships and the desire for novelty and excitement, particularly in sexual intimacy. She discusses how repressing desires or maintaining too much emotional closeness can inhibit erotic connection, proposing that intimacy thrives in relationships where partners allow for both closeness and distance. Perel emphasizes the importance of maintaining erotic energy and self-discovery within the confines of committed partnerships, providing insight into how couples can navigate sexual intimacy over time.

207 Klein, Marty. Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex—and How to Get It. 2003. St. Martin’s Press.

In Sexual Intelligence, Marty Klein explores the concept of sexual intelligence and how understanding our desires, expectations, and emotional needs can enhance sexual satisfaction. He argues that many individuals and couples struggle with intimacy because they are disconnected from their true sexual needs, often due to societal conditioning or personal insecurities. Klein provides practical advice for cultivating sexual awareness and creating healthier, more fulfilling sexual relationships. This book emphasizes open communication, self-acceptance, and a holistic understanding of sex that goes beyond physical mechanics to include emotional and psychological intimacy.

208 Ray, Darrel. Sex and God: How Religion Distorts Sexuality. 2012. Prometheus Books.

In Sex and God, Darrel Ray examines the relationship between religion and sexuality, arguing that religious teachings often distort and repress natural sexual desires. Ray explores how religious institutions, particularly Christianity, have shaped cultural attitudes toward sex, often associating guilt and shame with normal sexual desires. Drawing on psychological and sociological research, he discusses the damaging effects of religious dogma on sexual health and relationships.

209 Schnarch, David. Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships. 2009. W.W. Norton & Company.

In Passionate Marriage, David Schnarch delves into the complexities of maintaining both emotional and sexual intimacy in long-term relationships. He argues that true intimacy and sexual satisfaction arise from the ability to maintain a strong sense of self while being deeply connected to one’s partner. Schnarch discusses how personal growth, self-awareness, and confronting one’s insecurities play a pivotal role in fostering desire and connection. His approach challenges the conventional ideas of marital dynamics, encouraging couples to embrace vulnerability and emotional risk in order to keep passion alive.

210 Levine, Peter A. Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma: The Innate Capacity to Transform Overwhelming Experiences. 1997. North Atlantic Books.

In Waking the Tiger, Peter Levine explores the profound impact of trauma on the body, proposing that traumatic experiences are stored physically and can be healed through reconnecting with bodily sensations. This concept is particularly relevant for individuals who have lived in environments of repression, such as restrictive religious settings, where emotional and sexual desires may be suppressed or stigmatized. Levine’s Somatic Experiencing therapy offers a pathway for these individuals to heal by tuning into their bodily wisdom, helping them overcome the disconnection caused by years of religious conditioning. Through gentle exploration of the body’s sensations, individuals can release trapped emotions and re-establish a healthy connection with their true selves, reclaiming desires and identity that may have been suppressed by religious teachings. Levine’s approach provides vital tools for those recovering from emotional and spiritual repression to rediscover personal autonomy and emotional freedom. 

211 Orwell, George. 1984. New York: Penguin Books, 1949.

This quote is spoken by O/Brien during the torture scene. 

212 “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” (1 Corinthians 13:13)

213 Orwell, George. 1984. New York: Penguin Books, 1949.

214 Lakoff, George, and Mark Johnson. Metaphors We Live By. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1980.

This foundational text explores how metaphors shape human thought, perception, and communication, demonstrating that metaphors are not just linguistic tools but fundamental to understanding abstract concepts. The relevance to religious contexts lies in the role metaphors play in structuring beliefs about the divine, morality, and human purpose, influencing how religious communities interpret sacred texts and rituals.

215 Chomsky, Noam, and Edward S. Herman. Manufacturing Consent: The Political Economy of the Mass Media. New York: Pantheon Books, 2002.

Chomsky and Herman analyze how media serves as a tool for propagating dominant ideologies by controlling and filtering information, effectively shaping public perception and limiting dissent. The parallels with Orwell’s 1984 are evident in their exploration of how restricting the range of discourse restricts alternative thinking, reinforcing systemic control and conformity.

216 “The eyes of the Lord are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good.” (Proverbs 15:3)

217 Foucault, Michel. Discipline and Punish: The Birth of the Prison. Translated by Alan Sheridan. New York: Vintage Books, 1995.

Michel Foucault’s Discipline and Punish explores how modern institutions, including prisons and schools, use surveillance as a mechanism of control. Foucault’s analysis of the Panopticon illustrates how the possibility of constant observation compels individuals to self-regulate, a concept that parallels the subtle control mechanisms sometimes employed by churches.

218 Dispenza, Joe. Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself: How to Lose Your Mind and Create a New One. Carlsbad, CA: Hay House, 2012.

Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself offers a blend of neuroscience and psychology to explain how individuals can rewire their brains and transform their lives. The book provides practical tools and meditative techniques to help readers overcome self-limiting habits and create new, empowering mental patterns aligned with their desired reality.

219 Kandel, Eric R. In Search of Memory: The Emergence of a New Science of Mind. New York: W.W. Norton & Company, 2007.

In In Search of Memory, Eric R. Kandel explores the intersection of neuroscience and psychology, chronicling his groundbreaking work on the molecular mechanisms of memory. Drawing on his personal experiences and scientific research, Kandel provides a detailed, accessible narrative that explains how memory works at the cellular level and how this understanding has the potential to transform our approach to mental health and cognitive disorders.

220 Hood Jr, Ralph W., Peter C. Hill, and Bernard Spilka. The Psychology of Religion: An Empirical Approach. 5th ed. New York: Guilford Press, 2018.

In The Psychology of Religion, the authors explore various psychological aspects of religious experience, including the concept of confirmation bias in prayer. Through empirical research, they examine how individuals may selectively interpret their prayer experiences, often focusing on outcomes that confirm their pre-existing beliefs or desires, while dismissing or overlooking contradictory evidence, thus reinforcing their faith without critical reflection.

221 Tajfel, Henri, and John C. Turner. “An Integrative Theory of Intergroup Conflict.” In The Social Psychology of Intergroup Relations, edited by William G. Austin and Stephen Worchel, 33–47. Monterey, CA: Brooks/Cole, 1979.

Tajfel and Turner’s work on social identity theory highlights how individuals tend to bond with others who share common identities, especially when there is a clear distinction between in-groups and out-groups. Their research explains that denouncing or opposing an out-group creates solidarity within the in-group, strengthening bonds through shared beliefs and objectives, which aligns with the idea of people uniting by focusing on a common enemy.

222 Foucault, Michel. The History of Sexuality, Volume 1: An Introduction. Translated by Robert Hurley. New York: Vintage Books, 1990.

One of the key points Foucault makes is that the focus on sexuality as a topic of control (through confession, psychiatry, and other institutions) has a profound effect on personal identity. The suppression of sexual expression, then, is not just about external control but also about how individuals come to understand themselves through these power relations.

223 Akomolafe, Bayo. These Wilds Beyond Our Fences: Letters to My Daughter on Humanity’s Search for Home. Berkeley: North Atlantic Books, 2017.

In this deeply reflective work, Akomolafe explores the intersections of identity, belonging, and the structures of control that govern personal and collective lives. The author critiques the ways in which societal and religious systems often impose rigid boundaries that limit freedom, self-expression, and the pursuit of truth. Through letters written to his daughter, Akomolafe touches on the themes of decolonization, the power dynamics within religious institutions, and the role of education and information in shaping worldviews. 

224 You have searched me, Lord,
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you, Lord, know it completely. (Psalm 139:1-4)

225 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. (James 5:16)

226 “I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)

227 “Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.” (Romans 8:8)

228 Hood Jr., Ralph W., Peter C. Hill, and Bernard Spilka. The Psychology of Religion: An Empirical Approach. 5th ed. New York: Guilford Press, 2018.

This book explores how religious beliefs and practices shape psychological processes, with a focus on how confirmation bias influences individuals’ religious experiences and interpretations. It examines how people selectively perceive and interpret religious information in ways that reinforce their existing beliefs, contributing to their sense of spiritual certainty.

229 Tajfel, Henri. Social Identity and Intergroup Relations. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 2010.

This book presents Tajfel’s foundational work on social identity theory, focusing on how individuals derive their sense of self from the groups they belong to. It explores the psychological mechanisms behind in-group and out-group dynamics, shedding light on how group identification influences biases, including confirmation bias, and shapes perceptions of others, often leading to intergroup conflict and the reinforcement of existing beliefs.

230 Foucault, Michel. The History of Sexuality, Volume 1: An Introduction. Translated by Robert Hurley. New York: Vintage Books, 1990.

Foucault examines the relationship between power, knowledge, and sexuality, particularly how institutions, including the church, shape societal norms around sexual behavior. He discusses how the church’s authority has historically been used to regulate, control, and shame sexual expression, influencing not only personal guilt but also public morality, which aligns with how religious institutions often respond to sexual sin by enacting shame and ostracism.

231 “But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. Do not even eat with such people. What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked person from among you.”” (1 Corinthians 5:11-13)

323 “Knill, Paolo J., Ellen G. Levine, and Stephen K. Levine. Principles and Practice of Expressive Arts Therapy: Toward a Therapeutic Aesthetics. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers, 2005.”

This book provides valuable insights into how the body can be demonized or suppressed within certain institutions, which can relate to the harmful effects of denying the body’s natural instincts and experiences. The text suggests that by disconnecting from the body, individuals may struggle with self-trust and authenticity, which is relevant in discussions of how some religious practices may create a disconnect between spiritual life and bodily experiences.

233 Butler, Judith. Bodies That Matter: On the Discursive Limits of “Sex”. New York: Routledge, 1993.

In this foundational text, Butler explores how societal and cultural norms, particularly through language and discourse, shape and regulate the body, gender, and sexuality. While not focused specifically on religious control, her analysis can be applied to how institutions, including the church, often demonize or suppress the body and its desires to maintain control over individuals. Butler argues that the ways in which bodies are socially constructed and subjected to norms can lead to the repression of natural bodily experiences, and this critique aligns with the harmful dynamics where bodies are mistrusted or devalued within certain religious contexts.

234 Akomolafe, Bayo. These Wilds Beyond Our Fences: Letters to My Daughter on Humanity’s Search for Home. Berkeley: North Atlantic Books, 2017.

Akomolafe’s work, particularly in These Wilds Beyond Our Fences, touches on the body’s wisdom and its relationship to personal and collective healing, particularly in the context of decolonization and spiritual practices. He often reflects on how societal and institutional forces, including religious structures, suppress the body’s natural rhythms and knowledge, and how reconnecting with the body is a vital part of reclaiming freedom and authenticity.

235 Ray, Darrel W. The God Virus: How Religion Infects Our Lives and Culture. Bonner Springs, KS: IPC Press, 2009.

In The God Virus, Darrel Ray explores how religion can create emotional dependencies, particularly focusing on the addiction to guilt and shame. He argues that religious systems often use these emotions to control individuals, leading them to internalize feelings of guilt even after they leave the religious system. Ray highlights how these deeply ingrained emotional patterns can persist, affecting one’s self-worth and mental health. The book provides valuable insights into how religious doctrines, especially those centered on moral purity, can create lasting psychological effects, including an addiction to negative emotions like shame.

236 Winell, Marlene. Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion. Berkeley: Apocryphile Press, 2007.

Winell’s Leaving the Fold offers valuable insights into the psychological and spiritual challenges faced by individuals leaving fundamentalist and high-control religions. This work is particularly relevant for those looking to identify and unpack the theological conditioning that can shape one’s worldview, especially in the context of recovering from religious trauma and gaining a sense of personal autonomy.

237 Festinger, Leon. A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance. Stanford: Stanford University Press, 1957.

Festinger’s seminal work on cognitive dissonance theory explores the psychological tension that arises when individuals hold conflicting beliefs or behaviors. This theory provides a framework for understanding how theological conditioning can lead to cognitive dissonance, especially in the process of reevaluating deeply ingrained religious beliefs and practices.

238 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)

239 “Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve…” (Matthew 20:26-28)

240 “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23)

“All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6)

“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” (Jeremiah 17:9)

241 “Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me.” (Psalm 51:5)

“Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, and in this way death came to all people, because all sinned” (Romans 5:12)

242 “All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our flesh and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature deserving of wrath.” (Ephesians 2:3)

243 van der Kolk, Bessel. The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. New York: Penguin Books, 2014.

Van der Kolk’s The Body Keeps the Score delves into the profound impact of trauma on the brain and body, offering a comprehensive approach to healing. His insights are crucial for understanding how theological conditioning, particularly in high-control environments, can manifest as physical and emotional trauma that requires holistic healing methods beyond cognitive restructuring.

244 Winell, Marlene. Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion. Berkeley: Apocryphile Press, 2007.

In Leaving the Fold, Winell provides an in-depth exploration of the psychological effects of leaving fundamentalist religions. She introduces the concept of Religious Trauma Syndrome, detailing how individuals raised in such environments often struggle with issues like anxiety, depression, and identity confusion. This work is particularly valuable for understanding the long-term effects of religious conditioning and offers guidance for those seeking to heal from these experiences.

245 Kopytin, Alexander, and Madeline Rugh. “Green Studio”: Nature and the Arts in Therapy. New York: Nova Science Publishers, 2016.

Kopytin and Rugh’s work explores the therapeutic potential of nature and the arts, highlighting how integrating natural environments and creative expression can facilitate healing. This approach is particularly relevant for individuals recovering from trauma, including religious trauma, as it offers a way to reconnect with one’s body and surroundings, fostering emotional and spiritual healing through non-verbal and expressive therapies.

246 Levine, Pat B. Healing Through Movement: Simple Exercises to Restore Bodily and Mental Harmony. Alameda: Hunter House Publishers, 2010.

Levine’s Healing Through Movement offers practical exercises aimed at restoring physical and emotional balance, focusing on the mind-body connection. This book is valuable for individuals recovering from trauma, including religious trauma, as it emphasizes somatic healing and the importance of reconnecting with one’s body to process and release stored emotional distress.

247 “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (Isaiah 40:31)

248 van der Kolk, Bessel. The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. New York: Penguin Books, 2014.

In The Body Keeps the Score, Bessel van der Kolk explores the profound impact of trauma on the body and the brain, particularly the way trauma is stored in implicit memories. He introduces the concept that healing from trauma often feels more like “remembering” than “learning,” emphasizing that the body holds unconscious memories of safety and self that are vital for recovery. This process of reconnecting with bodily sensations allows individuals to access and process these implicit memories, facilitating true healing and restoring a sense of safety and agency in their lives.

249 Levine, Peter A. In an Unspoken Voice: How the Body Releases Trauma and Restores Goodness. Berkeley: North Atlantic Books, 2010.

In In an Unspoken Voice, Peter Levine emphasizes the crucial role of the body in trauma recovery, explaining that trauma disrupts our natural connection to the body’s wisdom. He describes healing as a process of “remembering” rather than “learning,” where the body holds implicit knowledge of safety and self. This knowledge can be accessed through somatic therapies, allowing individuals to reconnect with their bodies and restore a sense of safety and wholeness.

In Chapter 7, Levine explores how trauma survivors often report a profound sense of “coming home” to themselves when they reconnect with their bodies and emotions. This reconnection, Levine argues, involves rediscovering aspects of the self that were suppressed by trauma, allowing individuals to reclaim their authentic sense of being. Through somatic healing, survivors can access their body’s innate ability to heal and return to a state of equilibrium and well-being.

250 Jung, Carl. Memories, Dreams, Reflections. Edited by Aniela Jaffé, translated by Richard and Clara Winston, New York: Pantheon Books, 1961.

In Memories, Dreams, Reflections, Carl Jung explores the process of individuation, where healing involves reconnecting with repressed or forgotten aspects of the self. He emphasizes that the journey of self-discovery is one of “remembering” rather than “learning,” as individuals uncover and integrate unconscious truths. Jung’s retreat to Bollingen in Chapter 8 symbolizes his return to his true nature, reinforcing the idea that healing is about rediscovering what was always there. This concept is especially relevant for those recovering from religious trauma, as it involves reclaiming one’s authentic self.

251 “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” 

(1 Corinthians 13:13)